1984 & I
Babur's
Second Coming
Harvinder Kaur
 I
was in the 8th grade. What did I know? I knew my father
wasn't coming to my Junior High graduation. For me, that's what
mattered at the time.
It was June 6,
1984.
It was the same
night Peter Jennings came on the evening news and in a brief
30-second voice over, with an over-shoulder graphic of a burning
building, reported about the storming of the Darbar Sahib.
My parents were
in disbelief. They were in complete mourning. They were engulfed by
the news of a place I'd never even visited. All I knew was that it
was halfway across the world.
For the next
several days, the transistor radio was tuned diligently to find any
channel that would give some news of what was going on in
Punjab.
The TV news was on in hopes of catching some video or photographs of
how severe the damage really was.
The pictures
came, slowly, over the years. But the image of the collapsed Akal
Takht was clear as day. Something awful had happened. It would shape
the future of my nation, my people, and me.
The broken Akal
Takht was just the beginning. Then the reports came of the 37 other
Gurdwaras that were attacked simultaneously, to coincide with what
happened in Amritsar.
But even more
was to come in Delhi later in the year. The coordination was
stunning. Sikhs were burned alive, raped, hunted.
 While these were
the visible terrors, the reports of Woodrose, the operation that
went into full force after Operation Bluestar, would come trickling
out years later. Those stories were even more horrifying. They
demanded I become active and realize my own bond to the souls in
Punjab.
That's where my
Gurus, taught, created cities, and began the Sikh revolution more
than 500 years ago. It was burning again.
Was it our era's
second coming of Babur?
But really, in 8th
grade I didn't know what it had to do with me. For me, I remember
the disappointment I felt that night. How childish that was, given
that I now ache acutely every June as I remember in full force what
should never be forgotten.
That 8th
grade disappointment is nothing compared to the sorrow, outrage and
activism I now feel about that pivotal moment in modern Sikh
history.
I did make it to
that place four years later. I walked the parkarma of the Darbar
Sahib in December of 1988. This was the place that awakened a sorrow
in my parents I didn't realize they could possess. The place still
bore the marks of what had happened. But the worst damage had
already been plastered shiny new and white.
 But there were
still bullet holes, there were still broken marble columns and there
was still a hush. My mother told us of the boisterousness of this
holy place, but even in 1988, the quiet of the Darbar Sahib was not
because of the sacredness of the place, but because the walls, the
sky, Waheguru stood witness to what happened there.
I felt it then.
As I feel it again and again every time I return. While the crowds
have returned and the Akal Takht is new and every one in India talks
about forgetting and moving on, that sarovar reminds me of the tears
that must have been shed over the centuries, and again after 1984,
for the loss our nation has collectively endured.
But now, I am
part of that quilt of time and history. I have my own connection to
the blood that flowed for no true reason against innocents.
I'm not sure how
to describe my growing understanding of the impact of 1984. It has
matured over the years as I have grown and as more information
regarding those fateful times comes to light.
I have conducted
countless seminars to teach young people of the importance of this
modern history. There are still the detractors. Just like the
Holocaust deniers. Their choir chants: "It must have been
Bhindrawale's fault. He had weapons, he had women."
The
misinformation campaign has definitely captured a segment of the
community. They are still in fervent denial of this
government-sponsored attack, and the anti-Sikh pogroms of Delhi that
followed a few months later.
But what my mind
comes back to is, how does a democracy do this to its people?
Especially when you consider the sacrifices those from
Punjab
have given for the Indian Nation?
These, most
likely, are naïve questions. But, as a young person learning about
what and who my people are, in an effort to understand my own
identity, they were significant, because they are part of modern
Sikh history.
Moments that I
will remember.
Just like I'll
never forget where I was on 9/11.
 I hear many in
my generation and older say that they became stronger in their faith
or claimed their faith because of the events of 1984. This was not
the case for me. I always knew in the core of my heart that Sikhi
meant something to me.
This moment in
history did not make or break my commitment to my faith. But there
is no denying there are many who decided to keep their turbans and
become more observant in their faith because of 1984.
When I see the
images of what happened on that day in June and read the reports,
there is anger. I've seen the mutilated bodies, read actual court
filings of the thousands of reported missing in Punjab. Those cases
will probably never be truly solved.
But I am also
keenly aware, that we will overcome. Through all the pain, there
will be the words of our Gurus to lift us above those who violate
us.
Having
attacked Khurasan, Babur terrified
Hindustan.
The Creator Himself does not take the blame,
But has sent the Mughal as the messenger of death.
There was so much slaughter that the people screamed.
Didn't You feel compassion, O Lord? || 1 ||
O Creator
Lord, You are the Master of all.
If some powerful man strikes out against another man,
Then no one feels any grief in their mind. || 1 || Pause ||
But if a
powerful tiger attacks a flock of sheep and kills them,
Then its master must answer for it.
This priceless country has been laid waste and defiled by dogs,
And no one pays any attention to the dead.
You Yourself
unite, and You Yourself separate;
I gaze upon Your Glorious Greatness. || 2 ||
One may give
himself a great name,
And revel in the pleasures of the mind,
But in the Eyes of the Lord and Master,
He is just a worm, for all the corn that he eats.
Only one who dies to his ego while yet alive,
obtains the blessings, O Nanak, by chanting the Lord's Name. || 3 ||
5 || 39 || [GGS, M1, 722-23]
It is Punjab
that has sustained the subcontinent and will do so for ages to come.
It is our glorious Gurus who have sown the seed of Chardi Kala for
the people of
Punjab.
I believe that
we will remain strong and rise up against tyranny and allow the
truth to prevail.
So, I'm not that
upset 8th grader any more.
1984 wasn't
about my Junior High Graduation. It is seared in my mind for a far
more important reason.
(Courtesy sikhchic.com)
8
April 2009
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